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Banging the maid

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One fellow I was talking to was in Mexico and he was woken up by the maid had a morning woody. She told him that she would take care of him for 10 U.

He tossed her the dollar bill and she threw on a balloon and gave him a B. The maids in the place I was staying in a few weeks ago were pretty brutal.

The other hotels had better Senioritas! What the fuck ever happened to THAT?!? Any photos? I had a chance in Mazatlan but turned her down.

I still like my wife much more. Slip her a twenty with the towels!!! Had fun when I was in Monterrey Mexican girls are reaaaallllly friendly Now, if you can picture this, it would be really awkward in a sense.

You bang one of these maids one morning, and the next morning wake up with some pretty little flower you picked up at the bar the night before.

If that maid opens your door and sees you with her, what would her reaction be? Replies: 11 Last Post: , PM. Can anyone suggest a hotel near the Hardrock in Orlando?

Replies: 11 Last Post: , AM. Replies: 0 Last Post: , AM. Undersea hotel? Replies: 13 Last Post: , PM. Mental Floss may receive a commission for purchases made through these links.

In the 60 or so years that the job has existed, astronauts have captured the public's imagination. And while many people might think they have some idea of what being an astronaut is like, thanks to the glut of portrayals in movies, real astronauts will tell you that working for NASA is much different from what you see on the screen.

In between exciting tasks like spacewalks, they have to worry about less glamorous aspects of the job—like finding lost items that floated away and using the toilet in microgravity.

Mental Floss spoke with two former NASA astronauts about the realities of preparing for and experiencing life in space. Read on to learn about the most annoying parts of the job, the ways they have fun, and their honest opinions about astronaut food.

If someone knows they want to be an astronaut from a young age, they need to build credentials in a specific field before they can get the attention of NASA.

Two years toward a doctoral program in STEM, a completed doctor of medicine or doctor of osteopathic medicine degree, or completion of a nationally recognized test pilot school program are also accepted in place of a master's degree.

I've also flown in space with a geologist, I've flown in space with an oceanographer, and I've flown in space with a veterinarian. So it's really varied.

There's not just one route. Candidates accepted into the astronaut program must complete years of training before they're ready for spaceflight.

A lot of that training takes place in the classroom and involves learning about different space vehicles and systems. Astronauts also undergo physical training in the real world.

According to Garrett Reisman , former NASA astronaut and the director of space operations at SpaceX's headquarters in Hawthorne, California, one of the most intense courses has nothing to do with preparing for life in space.

You have to learn to live off the land, what plants you can eat, how to make a shelter and all those things. The T jets astronauts fly as part of their training have ejectable seats, so landing somewhere unfamiliar is a possibility.

But astronauts only fly over the continental U. Astronauts can lose up to 20 percent of their muscle mass on an day space flight due to the lack of gravity [ PDF ].

But zero gravity also makes free weights useless, so instead, astronauts maintain their strength by using a device outfitted with two small canisters that create a vacuum they can pull against with a long bar.

A bike and treadmill with a harness are also available on the International Space Station. Strength is required to perform certain emergency procedures when the ship re-enters Earth's gravitational field, so staying fit in space is vital.

In order to become one of the few people to travel to space, astronauts must be willing to do a lot of work at home. Reisman was with NASA for 12 years and spent a cumulative days of his career in space.

One of the biggest misconceptions astronauts hear about their work relates to their salary. Astronauts are paid according to the federal government's General Schedule pay scale.

Most federal jobs are assigned a General Schedule GS grade that determines their starting salary, and the pay increases as they gain experience.

For comparison, Fish and Wildlife administrators are paid similarly at the right experience level. Even in a place as tight as a space station, astronauts still manage to misplace their belongings.

They eventually found it trapped inside the airlock. The air filter is another common place where lost items end up: Without gravity interfering, the air flow will carry any floating objects there.

Despite its reputation, space food has some fans in the astronaut community. It was fantastic. Reisman holds a much different opinion of the meals he ate in space.

The Japanese sent up yakitori and miso soup and that was delicious. That was much better. Duties like maintenance, installing equipment, and conducting experiments take up the majority of their day.

Sneaking in recreation usually means staying up past their scheduled bedtime, which Reisman confirms most astronauts do.

One of his favorite activities to do aboard the International Space Station was taking pictures of Earth.

I got a picture of my hometown, which is pretty cool. As far as I know, no human ever photographed that particular town from space before.

Think about who they cast to be astronauts in all these movies and TV shows. Reisman doesn't hold this against the actors, however.

Pitt reminded him that the stars portraying astronauts on screen have plenty to be envious of themselves. The only talent I have is being able to stand in a certain spot and read something that someone else wrote.

I got nothing else. Without the help of gravity, using a toilet in space becomes a complicated operation. Astronauts must strap their feet down to keep from floating away and create a perfect seal between the toilet seat and their butt cheeks.

The toilet itself uses a vacuum hose to suction up the waste. It's not unusual for a bathroom break that normally takes a few minutes on Earth to last half an hour in space.

NASA's astronaut training program is extremely competitive.

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3 Replies to “Banging the maid”

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